Just Different.

I suppose it is healthy to realize that nothing will please everyone, everyone is different. I say “I can”- to some I’m egotistical. I say “I can’t” (even jokingly)- to others I’m negative. Teach something one way, please three people and three people hate it. I say “You can do it”, and according to some I’m acting like I’m better than everyone. I assure you I am not better, and I do not claim to be. Don’t be like me, I’ve made lots of mistakes with my attitude and handling and goals. I’ve gotten too high on my horse. I’ve been bitter. I’ve pulled my dogs off jumps when it matters most. I’ve gotten lost. I’ve set goals to win instead of learn. Do not be like me. Not that I’m saying you’d want to be like me- I am most definitely not saying that- maybe you think I suck. That’s cool- really it is. Maybe I do suck. I don’t mind if you don’t like me, I just wish there was a way to convey how I feel without people taking it the wrong way. Impossible, I know.

 In my last post, I talked about my dogs. Our accomplishments and failures, about the things we will not be capable of. But I in no way meant it to come off as “do this and you can be like me” or "look how good I am".  I am just happy to know I picked the paths that make my dogs happiest...maybe my accomplishments aren't impressive. Maybe my dogs are slow, or poorly trained- that's your opinion. Regardless of dogs or titles or styles, the truth is I am different than you. Not better, not worse…just different –I truly mean this...comparison is inaccurate. How can you rank handlers with different breeds, in different heights, with different styles, with different accomplishments? 

I am different with different dogs. You cannot compare Jenna to Whimzy. You cannot compare Jenna to Ally, or Ally to Nikki, or Nikki to Islay, or Jack to Whimzy, or Astro to Jenna, or Oz to Ally, or Kenzie to Whimzy, or Rigby to Islay. That is 4”, 8”, 12”, 16”, 20”, 24” and 26”- no two heights are the same. No two dogs run the same, even with the same handler. Comparison is bullshit. If I am different from one dog to the next, I can certainly say that I am different from every other handler. Every other handler is also different from me. Excuse my rambling, the point is don’t think I want you to be like me- not that you’d want to be- I do not expect people to see me run or read my blogs and want to be like me- not that you’d want to be. I don't write for compliments or likes or to brag (I really hate bragging), I write to remind myself of the things I've learned and as motivation to practice what I preach. I want to be the best version of myself- what I want for all my friends and students too. I am far from there yet, I still have lots of things to do and try and learn. There are many, many things that I do not know... However, I do know that I like seeing people do well. I like hearing people rave about their dog. I like when my students tell me they learned something new from a different trainer. I like new challenges and growing. I like the concept of staying humble, of staying positive, and I practice them as well as I can. I know I like being different- not better, not worse. Just different.

I may not be the best, but I am definitely not like the rest.